31-08-17

Tension throughout the body since 2 days, some very light seizures. Though it feels like stronger ones are building up. Bad sleep quality due to constant nightmares. Might be side effects again.

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Well, this is awkward

It has been a while since I wrote something. Not that I wrote a lot to begin with. But things have changed quite a bit in RL and I am still trying to adjust.

For the past years I’ve been having constant muscle spasms in my back – in the last year at least once per day. These in turn led to a constantly sore back which in turn led to bad sleep which in turn led to even worse spams. 2 different physicians looked into this and both sent me to physio and gave me sleeping pills to get more rest. However the problem never really went away.

In January I started to suspect that those spasms might not be muscle related at all. The main giveaway was the major seizure I had in the afternoon. I don’t remember a lot but according to my wife it was a combination of screaming, shaking and blacking out. The following weeks were filled with test and hospital visits, which is mainly a pain because the US medical system was designed by a braindead donkey and in my state the donkey had help from a family of mushrooms.

After they ruled out cancer (yay!) the doctors decided that it might be time to consult a neurologist. So now – after even getting a second opinion – I am a certified epileptic, a rather rare thing to happen in during adulthood. It could have been worse. My driving license is not going to be revoked. The meds are working surprisingly well. I tore my shoulder muscles during my big seizure but luckily I didn’t bite my tongue.

I initially didn’t plan to write about this. Now that I can control it I don’t feel that this is a big deal anymore. But I have been told to keep a diary of my seizures for myself and possible future consultations with my doctor. Epilepsy forums are a very depressing place to be and they don’t appreciate my style of shitposting (Somebody asked how she was supposed to cope with this and I suggested Taylor Swift’s Shaking song. They labelled me as a troll.). Writing on paper is not the best idea when the kid decides that everything is a canvas. Continuing this blog seems to be an acceptable compromise.

Willow has been spinning ships since a couple of weeks now. Her corp got evicted from the C4, apparently because our CEO was not popular among the wormhole community. I am very bad with following Eve politics and only learned about the reasons from the various Reddit posts. Personally I enjoyed most of my time there and don’t regret joining them. But since I anyway have to rethink my play style the eviction was a good excuse to drop corp and dock up.

All my accounts have been payed for a while so I can play Skilltraining Online and put all those skills on my list I have been avoiding until now: Willow got into Logi 5 and two Cruiser 5. My main (Yes, I consider Willow an alt. I might explain later.) is finishing up a few more Mem/Int skills before switching to all the Per/Will skills. All my toons are researching BPO, something which requires even less attention than PI.

I am still not sure how I can adjust my erratic playstyle to the new situation. We’ll see.